REWIND

I logged into my blog this morning to find a whole lot of comments.

Thanks peeps. I know you all got my back but somehow it seems as if my last post generated a lot of furore.
Apparently ‘Submission’ is a very controversial/sensitive issue for many people/couples.
After reading all your opinions, I think its only fair to voice out exactly what I feel about a woman submitting to her husband/boyfriend in a relationship.
I believe it’s not just plain this & that or black and white.
One has to apply a lot of wisdom and caution to matters of the heart. I also agree with princesa that there can’t be two captains in a ship. One person has to defer to the other.


The bible tells us that it’s the woman’s duty to defer to her husband but who says a woman can’t steer the ship for, instance? Some times a man out of LOVE can decide to let his wife/girlfriend’s decision prevail. It doesn’t mean he has let go of his position as the head of the home. It only means that he is mature enough to know that they are in the ship together and have equal stakes as individuals.
I think it all boils down to the big word-LOVE. If a man loves his wife thoroughly, submission won’t be an issue cos it will come naturally to the woman. It’s simple!

That's just my opinion. Feel free to disagree. Check out this blog too. She has something interesting to say on the issue of submission between couples.

FFF, you wanted to write about this issue too. Go ahead dear as long as no names are mentioned.

Moving on, I want to apologise for just hitting you guys with that previous post without giving you some background gist first which was why Laughter was asking if I was the one who initiated the meeting with O’s mum.

Anyway, I have decided to put up this post that I had typed before the last one. I wasn’t able to post it then and somehow, events just overtook each other.

I must warn you tho, it’s in my usual fashion, very looooong! lol…You might want to grab some popcorn and coke first ;) Oh well, just read on.

I look forward to reading ur comments meanwhile I’ll be at ur spots sooner that you know…
Kisses…

THE POST THAT SHOULD HAVE COME BEFORE


Hey guys!
I’m sorry if it seemed as if I had gone AWOL on you all.
First of all, let me say a very big Happy New year to everyone.
HhhhaaaappppyyyyyyNnnneewwwyyyeeeaaarrrr!!!!!
Hmmmmmphhh…*catching back my breath*
May 2009 be a year of fulfillment for all of us, Amen.

A lot’s been happening to me just that I haven’t had time to blog for a while. Been busy rounding up 2008, work and all…

Now I have a lil’ bit time, I guess I’ll just update you all on the happenings.

No I haven’t found a new love yet although there have been prospects just that they weren’t my type.

One of them was a cousin of a friend who is based in the U.S but returned to the country for the Xmas hols. I had gone to visit this friend on Xmas day, okay it was more like I had gone to eat Xmas rice at her place,lol…I hadn’t bothered to cook cos I was home alone(everyone had traveled to the Village for Xmas) and my friend had invited me to have lunch at hers so off I went.
Got there, ate and was busy chatting with her when this cousin of hers walked into the sitting room.
Her younger sister exclaimed:
“Aha! Aphro, have you met my fine cousin?”
I turned to look at the new comer.
He was fine all right but not my type of fine. For one, he was too light and looked like he used bleaching creams. That was number one minus. I didn’t want to be dragging cream in the house with my man,lol…don’t mind me ;)

I passed by him in the hallway as I was leaving their house and said goodbye but dude pulled me back and started asking for my details(name & number). I didn’t like the way he went about it but I didn’t want to embarrass him in front of my friend so I acquiesced and gave him the info he sought. His approach was number 2 minus for him tho.

Now, he is back in the U.S and has called me twice already but I don’t see any potential hook-up with him sha.

Maybe I’m still hung on O.
Scratch that, I am still hung up on him.
Yea, I know some of you might want to give me a slap right now,lol….
But the truth is that I still love him too much for my own good.
The temptation to call him has been really strong since this new year especially after my visit to Uncle E’s place on the 1st.

I had gone to visit Uncle E after I saw him at a family function and he had insisted I come by. He was alone with his wife at home when I went. All his kids were grown up now and were either married or on their own.

We had a nice time, gisting and all…Uncle E had always been fun to hang with. He has this very youthful disposition to life and always refers to himself as a ‘small boy’,lol…
His wife is also very warm so I was enjoying my time with them until talk about ‘O’ came up.
Remember his wife is O’s aunt. Refer to this post here.

So somehow the talk drifted to O. I think it was when uncle started complaining about his youngest son who worked in a bank and how he never had time for himself cos he was always working. He had even worked on Xmas day!
Then he said “It’s the same thing O’s mum is complaining about him. He is always working even on weekends, It’s too bad what these banks are doing to our young ones”

I agreed with him but also remarked that in O’s case, I seriously doubt if it was only the bank job that was keeping him busy.

Uncle laughed and retorted “What else then? Okay and you too!” His wife joined in the laughter. I had to defend myself. “Me? Noooo! He hardly even has time for me. In fact to tell you guys the truth we are no more together”

Of course, they were curious to know the whole story so I had to tell them. His aunt(uncle E’s wife) kept insisting that there was no other girl and it was his work at the bank that was keeping him always busy. Uncle was of the opinion that he wouldn’t vouch for him cos he was a young man and anything was possible.

Uncle E’s wife also mentioned that she had spoken to him a few days back and enquired about me. According to her he didn’t say anything to suggest that we had broken up. I only replied that maybe he didn’t want them to know.

They however said they were going to call him to hear his own side of the matter despite my insisting that it wasn’t necessary and I didn’t want him (O) to feel as if I came to report to them so that they could talk to him.

Later that same evening, when I was at home. Guess who called?
O’s mum.
She had called to wish me a happy new year and then she asked the question again:
“What is happening, why haven’t we been seeing you?”
I tried to dodge the question by saying it was nothing.
Then she said “I want to see you. Can you come by the house sometime?”
I answered “Okay ma”

I have been thinking whether to go see her or not. Maybe Uncle E’s wife had talked to her. I don’t want O to start feeling important or anything like that. His ego is already big enough but I also don’t want to appear disrespectful to O’s mum.

What do u guys think?




More gist...


Ehen…O and I had a long midnight conversation last night.
It all started with a text he sent that read thus:


“I’m listening to your boy Chris Brown singing our song-‘With you’ and am hearing the song in your voice. Why did you change and plunge us into this state of existence? Why Aphro?”

I didn’t quite understand him so I sent a reply:
“Me, plunge us into this state? It was you who decided you had had enough of the relationship and stayed away. I only left you alone to lick my wounds in private. Am not surprised tho, it’s always my fault when things go wrong”

He replied:
“Nne m, its not like that. I have my faults too. U just don’t strike me as making enough effort to meet me halfway on issues. If I didn’t come to you, why didn’t you attempt to come to me?”

My reply:
U talk about meeting you halfway when you didn’t even take a step? Maybe am old fashioned but I still believe a man should make the first move and the woman will follow”

Him:
“Remember when u would come see me on ur way out of the office. I always felt so happy seeing you. Was that old fashioned?

Me:
"That should tell you, I would do much more only if I felt that u cared for me. I stopped coming when I stopped feeling loved. U stopped caring and treated me like trash”

He:
“It would be a Herculean task to stop caring about you, if not impossible”

I was tired of the back and forth texting so I called him. It was midnight and already ‘Free calls time’.
We talked for quite some time. Mostly about how we ended up where we were. For him, it was our regular quarrels over silly stuffs that made him stay away. I still held my opinion that if he loved me he wouldn’t give up on the relationship but try to work things out.
I cant really recall all we talked about that night but I remember getting pissed at some things he said. Like when he said:


“Aphro, if we come back together, I’m going to have to be hard on you. I think I spoilt you and let you get away with some things. You are stubborn and I admit, I am too but we can’t keep struggling for supremacy in this relationship. It’s not possible”

I wanted to take him up on that statement but realized that things were still delicate at that point and I didn’t want to worsen the situation so I pretended I didn’t hear him.

We didn’t come to any conclusion that night cos his phone battery went dead and we couldn’t continue talking.

That was two days before the meeting at his mother’s.

Now, I don’t really know what the situation is…if we are back together or not.
We’ve been communicating but there is still a lot of underlying issues that we need to thrash.
A guy pal said to me yesterday:


“Aphro, you really love this guy so you just need to accept him the way he is and learn how to follow him so you guys won’t be having any more quarrels”

I agree I love him but does this mean I have to sentence myself to a life of unhappiness?



I deserve to be loved the way I want. I deserve it!

To comply or not...

So his mum called us for a meeting last Sunday.

Just me, him and her.

And she pointed out where we had both gone wrong

So we both said “I’m sorry” to each other

And promised to put the past behind us.

Obviously she loves me and wants me for a daughter-in-law

But her son’s got to love me too, innit?

She played all those childish games:

“Oya Aphro, go and sit on his laps…” “O, you go and hug her…”

And even though I found it all funny

The bitter taste of rejection and hurt lingers on in my mouth.

It’s not as easy as she made it seem

We still got a lot of issues to resolve

Like our silly quarrels over nothing

He also gave a condition…

“We can't both be captains in this relationship, Aphro. You’ve got to be the woman and let me be the man”

His mum concurred “My dear, you have to be submissive. I was too to my husband and he loved me until his death”

I agree, a woman should be submissive but do I have to lose my sense of self.

Do I have to agree to all he says even when I don’t feel like?

Can’t I even voice my own views without him thinking am trying to dominate him?

I have always had a strong personality…never been the meek type.

Why do I have to be someone else now?

I always thought, love should accept you the way you are and not try to change you.

It’s up to you, he said.

Comply or Forget me.


HAPPY NEW YEAR MY DARLINGS!

Me...Madam Mushy

Okay so I didn’t plan to spend the night in the arms of O. It just happened.

We had not been talking.
It had taken all the will power I had in me to stop myself from calling him all this while.
He had been sending all those texts that made me wonder if he really missed me as he claimed…I mean...what stopped him from calling?

Anyway Monday afternoon(the day before my birthday), I couldn’t hold out any longer. I missed him terribly and wanted us to see and talk so I sent this message.

“Hey what’s up? Can we see this evening?’

He replied shortly.
“Yes we can. I’ll be right over as soon as am through in the office”
So I got home from work and waited.
Soon enough, he arrived all smiles as if we never had any issues.
I kept a straight face sha, we had issues and they needed sorting out!

So we went to this hangout. Nice place. Poolside and music. Really romantic.
We talked.
About a lot of stuff. Random stuff. How have you been and all….
He asked about my birthday and how I intended to spend it. I didn’t have any plans to celebrate, I told him.
Then he told me he had missed me so much and the past days had been pure hell. Each time he picked up his phone to call, he had to drop it right back cos he didn’t know what to say to me. He knew exactly what I wanted to hear-“Baby let’s get married immediately!” but he really needed time, a few months to sort some things out.

I was like…. I wasn’t asking for marriage immediately o! I just needed to define where we were headed. What you wanted from me and all…

He said, okay so we are on the same page then. Why did we have to put ourselves through all that emotional turmoil? I really want to marry you aphro…all am asking for is some time.

I was silent.

Soon we drifted off to some other random stuffs. It felt so good to be in his company again, laughing at silly jokes like old times.

Time to leave came sooner than I wanted but we had to go, it was getting late. There were no plans to spend the night together as at then yet.

He was dropping me off in front of my house. We said our good nights and I made to get down when he pulled me back and claimed my mouth with his.

It was a mind blowing kiss!

“Baby, can we spend this night together? I just want to wake up next to you on your birthday” he pleaded.
“No way hosey! We still got unresolved issues. Sex will just complicate things right now”
“Who is talking about Sex? I just want to be with you baby. Hold you in my arms all night. I have really missed you so much”
I laughed.
“He he he he he…you hold me in your arms all night? Why does that sound so unbelievable?”
“Let me prove it to you. nothing is going to happen dear”
“No way…NO WAY! Just go home okay? It’s getting late already”
I got down from the car.
He got down too and came over to my side.
“Pleaseeeeeeeeeee babyyyyyyyyy”
“Nooooooooooooooooo…”
I looked at his face. I guess that was my undoing. He had this sad, lost puppy look on his face that melted my heart. What da heck! I also wanted to be with him so damn the torpedoes!
“Okay, okay, lemme get my stuff”

I didn’t regret spending the night with him.
He popped a bottle of wine at midnight and toasted to me. It was lovely.
Some other things went down too,lol…
Yes, he didn’t keep his promise....
Okay I admit, he did try but na me no let am,lol…
Anh…anh don’t blame me jooo…
Since that last time, nothing…nothing and we’ve only done it that once o! We dey try abi?lol….

And he also apologized formally.
I was standing in front of the mirror brushing my hair when he hugged me from behind.
“I know I have been an ass lately love. I am so sorry. Forgive me baby…”

I smiled. I had already forgiven him. If I hadn’t I wouldn’t be in that hotel room with him.

Okay so I subscribe to this daily horoscope reading thing. This morning in my mail, I saw this.

My Romantic horoscope reading for today:

“How unrealistic are your goals when it comes to love? Do you think your lover will be a drop-dead gorgeous genius with the patience of a monk and the passion of a tango instructor, or are you cool with just dating a mere human? Time to reassess reality.”

I was staring the hard stark truth in the face…sometimes these readings are right on point o!


You know what?
I'm smiling like a cat that just drank a big bowl of milk right now.
Here's why...

O and his elder sister just left my office now. She sells stuff as in jewellry, clothes and perfumes and he brought her so I could pick what I wanted from her stock.
It wasn't just the fact that he wanted me to pick something from her that tripped me. It was the fact that HE LEFT WORK! If you know how tight it is for this bobo to leave office eh? You go understand wetin I mean.
Anyway, his sister's stuffs were expensive o...
I didn't want to be greedy and just took a bottle of perfume (Jennifer Lopez-Live) and a watch although his sis was urging me to take more.
I was like "We don't want to finish our money o"lol...
Even at that, the stuff I took came to about 25K.
In my mind, I was like E no go better say them give me the money cash?
He He he He...No mind my Ijebu traits,lol...

Haa...i just received a text from O now on my phone.
I'll share it with you guys.
"Aphro.....I can call ur name all day and night and it wouldn't be able to convey the depth of my love for you. You are the music of my life. Shall we dance?"

The bobo dey impress me sha...

Abeg make una leave me o...

I be Madam Mushy today, lol...

Unexpected morning visit

Oh my God!
Guys guess who just left my office now.
O!
I was standing at the reception talking with a colleague when he walked in. My heart did a backflip, I swear. You know, it was just so unexpected like he is the last person I expected to see this morning.
I led the way to my office and thankfully, my colleague who I shared office with wasn’t around so we had all the privacy we needed.
Long and short of the tory is that. Bobo has been miserable for the past one week and doesn’t want me to give up on us easily. I told him, I had already given up and was trying to heal. He said he was going to pretend he didn’t hear that. “Trying to heal over what now?” he asked.

Anyway, he is ready to meet my folks and wants me to meet his mum but then again he still wants us to take things a bit slow. In his own words “Let’s us grow together Aphrodite”.
I asked him “O tell me the truth, do you think you are psychologically ready for marriage” and his reply was “Yes I am very ready”.
"I hope I am not pressuring you or anthing. I want my husband to be crazy about marrying me and not feel that that I pressured him into doing so"
"Babes, stop saying that now. I am crazy about you, serious!"

Me I don’t know what to do again o. I’m kinda confused. I am still very much in love with him. In fact lemme confess. He was sitting far from me o, but do you know when he left, I realized my panties were soaking wet. Kai dis my treacherous body!

He has left now. He had an official assignment outside the office and used the opportunity to drop by although he promised to come back as soon as he is through with the assignment.

The last thing he said to me before he left was “Aphrodite, I love you. I really do”.

Jesu!

O or X?

Helloooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!
The truant is back!
Yes o, no be for only school na im person dey be truant o. I have given myself the title-“Ogbonge truant of Blogville”,lol…
First of all, let me apologize to those that haven’t seen me at their blogs. Really am truly sorry but you know the reason now…work! I dey try small sha to pop in once in a while but it’s not been easy I must confess. I hail those who are able to update everyday and check all the blogs cos e no easy ra ra…

Secondly, I’ll like to thank everyone who drops by to read and comment. I appreciate all of you and y’all make me look forward to coming here everytime.

Okay that done. Now to give u the latest gist.

O finally broke the silence by Monday evening. He sent a text asking how I was and all. I replied his text telling him I was doing fine and asking after his affairs too. A few minutes after I sent the text, he called. I guess he was probably waiting for the green light(my reply) lol…

We spoke at length. He apologized for blanking me out and I accepted his apologies. However, I told him I didn’t like his way of cutting me out each time we had an argument and he promised he was going to stop doing that.

So we made up.

I haven’t spoken about X for some time now and it’s not becos we haven’t been in touch. We have been seeing each other; you all know his office is just opposite mine so he comes in regularly to say hi. Then again we live in the same vicinity so he comes around to the house sometimes. I must admit that I haven’t been discouraging him. Truthfully, he has been exceptionally good to me. Really caring and all…it’s almost like we are back to the way we used to be.

Am sure peeps like Charizard and LG go don dey frown by now,lol…

Okay I confess, I have started liking X all over again o. Maybe its becos O has been acting sme-sme of late and X has been like the perfect boyfriend model. I don’t know if that’s the reason but I sha know I am liking the guy even though my likeness never reach the point wey I go dey accept im sexual advances,lol…

Sometime last week, X was in my house and my folks had all gone out. We were watching TV together when small time bobo come begin to dey rub my body and come dey try to kiss me. I put on this fierce face and told him to “Stop... I don’t want!” Then I moved over to another couch. The bobo didn’t like it but wetin im go do? True am feeling him but not to that level yet. Man must tread cautiously abeg and O still dey there sef.

Anyway some times when we are together and O calls. I see the look X gives me but I sha ignore him. Once, I got a text from O and as I was reading it, I forgot X was there and I was smiling this goofy smile. When I finish reading and looked up, X was looking at me with a funny look on his face. I asked him “What?” and he said “That was a guy’s text that is making you smile abi?” I didn’t reply.

Then I asked him a question.

“Are we back together, what are we really doing?”
He says. “Yes we are back together babe”
Am like, “How did that happen…you do remember I told you there was someone in my life?”
He goes. “Yes I do and now you mention it, we need to talk about it. I noticed you have been receiving phone calls from some guy and text messages too. I know you’ve said it before but I didn’t believe you. Now I want to hear it from you again. Do you have another guy?”
I look at his face and see the seriousness. “Yes I do, am seeing another guy”
He looks like he had just been slapped and I noticed he tries to pull himself together and give me that macho attitude that guys give.
“Okay so now we need to get this settled finally. You have been with me and now you are with this guy. I want you back, in fact I want to marry you but I don’t want to be the second guy in your life. It’s either me or that guy. I want you to choose now so we can sort this once and for all”

The last time this came up between X and I , I somehow got out of it, now this is looking really tight!

Most of you probbably think i should tell X off and stick with O but It's not that easy. I couldn't! At that point when X asked me to choose, I realized that I still feel something for him a lot of things flashed through my mind. I remembered when we used to date and how good and caring he always was. X always went out of his way to ensure i was happy. He never gave me attitude like O does sometimes. Even when I misbehave he is always quick to forgive and forget. Do I really want to give up X for O?

And then I remembered the last time I was with O. That was a day after we had made up over the phone. We hung out after work and he had apologized all over again, saying he was going to put in more effort to make our relationship work.
I had asked him the ultimate question most unserious guys hate to hear. “What do you want out of this relationship”. I didn’t mean to pressure him to say he wanted to marry me o, I just wanted to psych him up a little.
His response was: “I really care about you babe and want you in my life but I want us to take this one day at a time”

O wants to take things a day at a time.
X wants to marry me today today

What do I want?
I want to marry a man that I love and respect and who will love and respect me forever.

The question now is who will that man be? O or X.

O hasn’t proposed o and X seems to be getting impatient for an answer.

Una fit help me for this one?

Happy weekend everyone!

Update Gist.

“Babe are you enjoying the movie?”
X moved in to close the space between us and wrapped his arms around my shoulders.I felt he was too close for comfort and tried to pull myself away but he held on tightly.
“Yea, I am”
That was not particularly true cos I was yet to fully understand what the movie was all about. So far, it had seemed boring and I wasn’t really feeling the movie and the unpopular faces being paraded in it.
It was a Saturday and I was at a cinema with X. I had been too happy to accept his offer when he called to propose it cos I didn’t have anything better planned for the day and my other option would have been to stay in bed feeling blue over O’s recent attitude and wishing he would call.
So there I was with X in the cinema and he was trying to get all touchy feely and lovey dovey but I was trying to squirm out of his grip without making it so obvious.
I stared sideways at him and couldn’t help noticing the goofy grin on his face. He seemed so happy being with me there. I asked my self if I was happy to be there with him or was it just a welcome escape from a dreary day. I hadn’t arrived at an answer yet when he butted into my thoughts with a comment on the movie. I didn’t even hear what he said but nodded smiling as if I did.

I turned my attention back to the movie but yet again I couldn’t stop my thoughts from wandering. I thought of the woman at the body care shop. We had stopped over there to look around before we headed for the cinema. Coincidentally, X had known her from somewhere and they exchanged pleasantries like long-lost friends. X introduced me to her as ‘My woman’. I wasn’t sure I was comfortable bearing that tag just yet. I had bought a facial soap and promised the woman I’d be back some time in the future to buy the body shop oil perfume I liked.
I wondered what she would think if I sauntered into her shop at a later date with O cos this particular mall was one I visited with O at times. Of course she would expect me to be with X since he had given her the impression we were an item, a hot item at that. Would she think I was a loose girl who dated several men at the same time? What did I care really? I wondered.

The movie soon ended and I was grateful. I had seen better movies and this one didn’t cut it with me at all, something about a bank job(robbery). It was the same old, same old, nothing new there.

As we drove out of the mall, O asked if I wanted some ice-cream. We could head to a particular popular ice-cream joint, he offered. I wasn’t too keen on that cos I was on some kind of diet. Diet? Who was I kidding? I usually spoilt the diet soon after I started,lol…. I made a mental note in my head not to spoil this particular diet with my longthroat,lol..

So I declined and asked that we head home. I had an appointment with my tailor that evening so I might as well go see her. He said okay and we headed home.
As he dropped me off at my tailor’s, he made to kiss me. I still wasn’t ready to start exchanging mouth liquids with him just coupled with the fact that I was still technically with O and I was still kissing him(we are not shagging o). That is one thing with me, I can’t bring myself to kiss two guys at the same time talk less of shagging them both, am not just that type of girl!
So I turned my cheek for a peck, thanked him for the date and got down.

Sunday came.
I didn’t hear from O still and I wasn’t ready to hang out with X again. Two days in a row would just confirm that we were back together and I wasn’t sure about that yet so I prepared for a quiet day of lounging at home. I was lying in bed reading a novel when K’s call came in. God! I had practically forgotten he still existed. I picked the call and we yakked a lil’bit. How have you been and all that bla bla bla. Then he asked if we could see cos it had been a while and he wanted to talk to me. I didn’t bother asking him about what cos I already knew it won’t be on anything else than how much he loved me and wanted me to consider him and bla bla bla,lol..
Anyway I was in a low spirits cos of O and it wouldn’t be bad to have someone toast me and make me feel good about myself (Not fair on K, I know so hold on with the preaching guys). I spent the rest of the day with K, he took me to a buffet lunch at one popular hotel like that and I have to admit, I had fun although at a point I was thinking how it would have been much more fun if I was there with O and not K.

Through out our date, K kept asking me about my boyfriend. I kept saying which boyfriend? Did you dash me boyfriend? But he insisted that he knew I was in love with someone and I was dating this person. He made reference to those times he’d called my phone in the middle of the night only to discover I was talking with someone. I knew he was talking about O but I didn’t want to confirm anything so I just sat there and smiled all through.

Something else he said caught my attention. He said although he wanted to marry me, he wouldn’t kill himself if I gave him an invite to my wedding soon. He’d take it as one of those things but that it would hurt him terribly if it turned out to be X, I was getting married to(yea, they know themselves and there is some sort of rivalry btw them).
I laughed and asked him why marrying some other guy would hurt him less than me marrying X. He didn’t give me a cogent reason but I suspect it had something to do with X finally getting what he(K) didn’t get.

On to O.
I saw O for the first time in more than two weeks, yesterday.
I was at my desk working in my office, trying to finish a presentation I was working on before leaving for home when I saw his familiar figure at the door. How come the receptionist didn’t call to inform me he was here, I wondered. Plus I was looking really harassed and disheveled. If she had informed me, I could have applied powder and brushed my hair or something. I hadn’t seen him(O) for a while and I would have loved him to see me looking fab.
“There was no one out there so I let myself in” he said as he walked in.
I looked at the time, phew! It was after 5pm already, the receptionist must have left, she hardly waited for the official closing time before taking off. Probably to see her own bf, what my own sef?lol…

I didn’t know what to do. All at once so many emotions were conflicting in my head. Anger, Excitement, Sadness, Happiness, I just didn’t know what to feel exactly so I turned my attention to the computer monitor, my work suddenly seemed more interesting.
Then he came close, wrapped his arms around me and buried his head in my neck. I caught a whiff of his scent, Kouros, I had made him buy it, it was one perfume that almost always get me weak in the knees and that moment wasn’t an exception. Then he tuned my face and kissed my lips. I could already feel the throbbing down there and I needed him to stop before I gave myself away.

Anyway he stayed for a while and we talked.
He apologized for his recent attitude and told me the issues he had with his former bank had been sorted out.
I was silent for a while, then i asked. “Was it some other woman?” he shook his head.
“It was just work stress and the issues you had?” I questioned again. He nodded his head.

As we hugged and kissed before he left, I was in no doubt that I truly cared about this guy. Why is it that it’s the one we love that causes us so much heartache? Why can he be just as doting as K or X or Bobo Nice or BG? Maybe we don’t have a future together but one thing I know is this, I’m going to enjoy it while it lasts!

Have a great weekend y’all, love ya!

UPDATE ON O

I am happy.
Yes, it’s because of O!
I think he really cares for me.

Okay let me start from where I stopped the last time.
That night I planned to call him by midnight(during happy hours) but slept off and didn’t wake until about 3am.
Then I decided to call but his phone kept ringing and he wasn’t picking it. After 4 tries, I gave up and went back to sleep. When I got up to prepare for work in the morning I had a text message on my phone. It was from him. He was sorry he had missed my calls and blab la bla.

I didn’t reply the text. I just went ahead to prepare and leave for the office. Unfortunately for me I forgot my phone at home. I only discovered after I had gotten to work and there was no way I was going back because of the phone. I simply resigned myself to being phoneless for the day.

On getting home later that evening, I had like twenty three missed calls on the phone. O’s was like 5 out of them. He had also sent me a text message that read:
“Too busy to take my calls? Even during the day?
Okay if you don’t wanna talk to me, at least send me a text. Am concerned
about you ”

When I read the text my heart melted and I replied, telling him I forgot my phone at home. A few minutes later he called and we talked for a while. He was so sorry he hadn’t called me for a while and he explained that he had been having some issues in the office and he was even angry at me that if he didn’t call, I wouldn’t.
We finally apologized to each other and I promised to call him at midnight so we could talk more.

Later, in the middle of the night , we talked a whole lot more. 1am till 4am(three whole hours!) and it was only when I insisted that we had to sleep cos both of us had jobs to go to in the morning that we finally ended the call. It’s always so good to talk to him cos he really makes me happy and he says it’s the same for him too.

He also came to pay me a visit at the office later in the day. I was so delighted when he called me to say he was in front of my office. I was impressed. He spent about 45mins with me in my office before he left.

On another note.

I think I might have a problem in my hands soon if this thing with O keeps getting deeper. You see I am an Ibo babe and my folks are VERY tribalistic…you know insisting I marry from my own tribe and all that. Thing is up till now, I never had issues with that because I had never met a non-ibo guy I really liked well enough to get serious with until I met O that is.
With O, things are different. I really like this dude and there are indicators that he feels the same way but I forsee a bleak future(if any) for us because of my folks. It would really be a WAR getting them to accept O as a son-in-law. There is something though. O is partly Ibo. His dad is Edo while his mum is Ibo. He’s got an Ibo name and he speaks a little funny ibo too,lol! Anyway, I don’t know if that is gonna give him an advantage with my parents.

Another thing is this, we are Catholics and my parents would love so much for me to get hooked to a catholic man too. Parents whose children don’t marry from the church lose certain priviledges like they can’t join the knighthood or for the mother, she loses the chance to ever receive the prestigious “Ezinne”(Good mother) award. Only mothers whose daughters do not get pregnant out of wedlock or marry outside the catholic church are eligible for the award.

Yesterday evening I was chatting with my mum and somehow our conversation drifted to INTER-RACIAL/DENOMINATIONAL MARRIAGES. The daughter of a family friend(they are Ibo) recently gotten married to a Yoruba guy from Osun state and a cousin of mine(they are Catholics) had just come to inform my folks that she was getting married to a guy who is Anglican.

Mum: You know her mum said they had to consent to the marriage when they
realized she was already in the family way. (She was talking about my cousin).

Me: I suspected! The last time she was here, she looked pregnant.

Mum: Yes. Initially her dad insisted he wasn’t going to be a party to the wedding but
her mum finally convinced him to. For her, its better that her daughter got married to an Anglican than for the story to be that she got pregnant in her father’s house.

Me: I guess so. It’s a better deal for all of them.

Mum: Ehen…you know Mr. Obi(pauses as I nod in affirmation). His daughter just
got married to a guy from Osun state! (She said it like that was a abomination,lol!)

Me: Really!! Osun state??(I was genuinely surprised. This is a very rare occurrence where I come from. I thought about the battle the girl must have fought with her parents before they gave in and silently gave the girl kudos in my mind)

Mum: Yes o! I hear he was her childhood friend in Benin where they grew up.

(Slight pause in our discussion as I was still deep in thought. I looked up at my mum, she was engrossed in the programme showing on TV )

Me: Mum…??

Mum: Yes…??(She turned to look at me with raised eyebrows)

Me: Which would you prefer? For me to marry a non-catholic or a non-Ibo guy??

She looked at me intently, probably searching for clues to know if I was dating any of the above. After a while, she looked away and seemed to ponder about my question

Mum: Hmmm…that’s a hard one o! Non- catholic I don’t like…and Non- Ibo…that
one too is out of it.

Me: But mum…I can’t keep limiting myself like that! If the Ibo guys are not coming, will I kill myself or wait forever??

She didn't say a word, she just kept mum.

I knew it was time to stop before she began interrogating me to find out which of the forbidden two I was dating. The Non-ibo or the Non-catholic,lol! I already had the answer I sought. She obviously didn’t like any of the two options.

Pity O is both of them. Non-ibo and Non-catholic. This thing go hard o!
Anyway make we dey look, its not as if O has proposed or anything of that sort yet but is it better not to start what looks like I wont be able to finish or should I just keep going with my heart and pray we’ll cross the bridge successfully when we get to that river?

I have talked to him about this and he says he doesn’t want to lose me because of the fact that we don’t come from the same tribe or we don’t attend the same church. He feels we should not let them(my folks) come between us. We have agreed to just take it slowly and see where it all leads.
Hopefully someplace good. *Fingers crossed*

Opinions peeps??