Out in the Open finally...

Before I start today’s post, I’ll like to say this.
I do not write these stuff about my love life because I don’t have a mind of my own and I need people to tell me what to do.
No!
The reason I come here to post happenings in my love life is for the sole reason that nobody knows it all. It is always good to have a neutral opinion about issues. One could be thinking one thing based on one’s understanding and another person comes up with an entirely different perspective of the same issue and you realize that things are not exactly how you initially thought them to be.
Most times, it is the person who stands at the side watching a fight that can actually give a correct account of what led to the fight and which party was at fault not the one who was involved in the fight himself.
I find that a lot of times from the comments you leave I have been enlightened further or my eyes have been opened wider to see certain things in a different light than I initially did. You my friends, have been really awesome so far and I do not regret starting this blog or sharing my experiences with you. Not at all. I will continue to write them down and I hope you continue to bless me with your intelligent comments.
Thank you my dears.
Aphro.

Phew!
Finally got that little speech over with.
Now to today’s post.

It turns out that X didn’t put me on suspension afterall.
Okay lemme start with O.
The whole of that day (Monday), I didn’t pick his calls or reply his messages till late evening when I got back from work. By then I was beginning to feel sorry for him so when he called again for the umpteenth time that night, I answered. He sounded really worried and asked if there was any problem and why I hadn’t been picking his calls. I said there was no problem and that I had been busy all day. Then he asked why I didn’t return his calls when I saw them and I said I didn’t want to. From my reply, he knew something was up and kept asking me what it was. I finally caved in and said I was mad at him for not calling me all through Sunday. His reply was that he thought I would call if I was free but I didn’t so he felt I had other plans. I said
“hmm…hmmm, na so!” He sha apologized and I said he shouldn’t bother cos there was nothing to apologize for. Then he asked if we could talk during happy hour (free midnight call time). I said he could call if he was awake. Conversation ended. He didn’t call that night. I guess he over slept. I didn’t call too although I was awake.

Oh! Before I forget. I called X that Monday night too. Had some spare credit on my phone and felt wharrahel, lemme just lhim and feel his pulse. It was a very brief one.
Me: Hello…
X: Hello…
Me: What’s up? Are you okay?
X: Yea I am…
Me: Okay, I just called to make sure you were okay cos I haven’t heard from you all these while. Good nigh…
X: Am fine. How is Mum, Dad and everybody…
(I didn't let him finish. If he was that concerned about my folks he should have called to enquire about how they were doing and not wait till I call to start asking me long questions)
Me: Everybody is fine. Good night.
X: Okay Good night. Will see you tomorrow…
Click.(line dropped.)

Next morning (Tuesday). I was still trying to settle in for the day’s work when X dropped in. I looked up and said “So the reason you dropped in today was cos I called you last night abi? If I didn’t call you, you probably won’t be here this morning”.
He tried to refute what I said and explained that he had been very busy as they had been having training since the previous week in his office and he was in charge of co-ordinating things.
I wasn’t accepting that excuse though. “So your training extended even to your house after work? What happened to all those times you dropped in after work? Anyway whether you admit or not, I know that the only reason you came here this morning is cos I called you last night”
He would not agree with that. “It’s not true baby. I have been very busy. Okay am very sorry please forgive me. You know I don’t like it when you are angry”.
I looked at his face. “Me, angry?! Nooo, for what now. No need to apologise ke”.
After some awkward minutes of silence. He goes “Okay, I have to get back to the office now. I’ll see you later”.
I nod my head and he turns to leave but stops suddenly.
“Ehen! how are we celebrating your birthday?”My birthday is coming up soon-September 2nd. I was impressed he remembered but I reply nonchalantly.
“My birthday? I’m not celebrating”
“I’ll like to take you on a trip to Ghana”
“Ghana? I don’t think I want to go anywhere…”
He stares at my hand on the table and says “And I have something I want to give you but it has to wait till then”
Next he lifts my hand off the table, holds my ring finger and asks “Hmm…what size of ring do you wear?”
In my head. Am already doing the logic & reasoning.
“Why are you asking?"
“Nothing just wanted to know…”
“Anyway, I don’t know the size…”
I give him this odd look. He has a funny smile on his face. “It’s okay. Don’t worry” he says and turns and leaves finally.
I look at the closed door in alarm.
OH MY GOD…HE WANTS TO GIVE ME AN ENGAGEMENT RING ON MY BIRTHDAY!
I feel the panic rise in my throat and my mind goes into a riot.
Yeee…Things are getting serious. It’s high time I make a decision what road to take and stick to it o! What if he gives me an engagement ring? What do I do? Accept it…or reject it? I don’t even have the answer to that. I want to get married and X is not a bad guy but O…ha O!..I love O! But does he love me as well? Does he think am worth sharing the rest of his life with? Maybe he doesn’t love me like that. Aphrodite stop jumping to conclusions. Talk to him first. Gauge his reaction. That should give you a clue as to what to do next.

All these were the thoughts going on in my mind.

Finally, I arrive at a conclusion.
I need to have that talk with O again.
This time I was not going to take “let’s take it a day at a time” for an answer. It is either he wants or he doesn’t want. Six months is enough time for him to know if he wanted this relationship to be a permanent one or not.
My mind made up to talk with O, I calmed down and faced the day’s work

I was in the middle of work when he called me. O i mean.
He apologized for not staying awake to call as promised the previous night. I said it was okay. He noticed I wasn’t sounding too bright and he asked “Aphro what is the matter? Are you still angry with me?” “Nothing is the matter. Just that we need to talk” I replied.
“Talk? About what? Tell me what it is” I could feel the rising curiosity in his voice.
“It’s not a telephone conversation. We’ll talk when we see”
“Okay, I’ll try to leave the office early and come by to see you at home this evening. Is that okay?”
“Yea, it is. See you then”
“Bye”

Throughout the rest of the day. I kept thinking about the impending discussion with O and how I was going to present the issue.I didnt want it to look like i was a desperado for marriage or anything like that. I even chatted with a close girlfriend about it. She had never being a fan of O and kept telling me “Aphro fashi dat guy, he is not going to marry you”. However when I gisted her about how O spent the night at the hospital recently with me when I was admitted for one day (Sorry I didn’t blog about that). She had a change of heart and said she didn’t know he was that caring. She also agreed with me that it was necessary to talk with him and determine exactly where the relationship was heading.

Buoyed by my chat with my friend. I was ready for 'The Talk'

I got home that evening to find my mum in the mood for a chat. She asked how my day went and I found myself telling her everything. She already knew X was staging a comeback in my life but she didn’t know how serious things were. I have never been more open on love issues with my mum as I was that evening. I told her about how I wasn’t feeling the love for X as I used to. How I think he is planning to propose to me on my birthday. The Ghana trip. Then I told her my biggest secret these past six months. I told her about O.
How he was the one I loved now. How nice he was and that he works in a bank. She seemed cool with my gist until I mentioned he was Edo but his mother was Ibo. She sat up straight, looked me in the eye and said “Why do you always like to go the negative way?”
I'm like “How mum?” She goes on. “Edo? God forbid! Let them use their witchcraft and kill my daughter for me, no way!”
I know better than to argue so I let her finish talking before I start explaining the connection O has with uncle 1004. Remember I had said in an earlier post- The pleasant surprise that O’s aunt(his mother’s younger sister) is married to my uncle(Mum’s relation). After my explanation. Mum calms down a bit. She didn’t look like she was ready to kill anyone anymore,lol…but she goes on to advise me to forget about O and stick with X because the devil you know is better than the angel you don’t know(her words exactly).
I say “Mum, but you haven’t met him yet now…” She says “Why do I have to meet him? There is no point. Nne you can’t go to Edo please”. She goes on to lecture me about Edo people and how they are known for diabolical stuffs. I listen in silence. After a while she says. “Talk to your father about it, let us hear what he has to say”
I go “Haa…I can’t o! You want him to kill me?!! Mum you tell him for me”
She laughs. “Nooo! Tell him yourself”
Shaking my head vigorously and saying “Noooooo” I get up and head to my room. I needed to change and wait for O.

Sorry guys. I have to continue this post later. Damn! it is too long as it is already and my fingers are numb from typing. Promise to be back sooner than you think. Gist plenty ooooo...so stay tuned,lol...

Expecting to read your sincere intelligent comments as usual.

xxkissesxx

Suspension for O & X

Hello everyone.
Am back and better! Thanks for all the beautiful, insightful comments you left on my previous post. You can’t possibly know how much I appreciate all of them. May God continue to bless every one of you and grant your heart’s desires, AMEN!!!

The latest gist now is this- X and O are on suspension,lol…

Okay more like, X put me on suspension and I put O on suspension.

Let me add more flesh to the gist…before I start, I must warn you all that this is going to be one of my usual long assed post so get urself some salt&sugar popcorn, than sit back and read,lol...

Starting with X…

The Friday(before my last post). I was back at home from work and just lying in bed when X’s call came in. He was like “Babes, are you home? I want to see you”. I said okay fine. Then he asked if I wanted him to get me Suya (he knows I have a soft spot for suya,lol…), I said it was okay.

I was still waiting for X to come when O called me. While on the phone with O. X’s call came in but I didn’t answer it since I was still talking with O. Just as I ended the conversation with O, X call came in again. This time I answered and he said he was outside my house so I went out to meet him.

When I got outside, he handed over the Suya and drink to me. I took it and thanked him. Then he said “I called you before, didn’t you see my call?” . I was like “yeah, I did…I was on the phone then”. “So why didn’t you call me back when you were through with your call” he continued. I said “Cos you called almost immediately”. Then he went on about how long he had been waiting outside my gate and all. I was getting pissed and asking myself if the Suya and Coke was worth listening to his lamentations,lol… Anyway sha, after a while he now chilled and we talked about some other stuffs. He didn’t seem like he was in a hurry to leave and I wanted him to cos O had said he may come see me that evening if he was able to round up his work on time. So I told him I was busy with some stuffs inside the house and I had to get back inside. He said okay and moved closer to give me a kiss but I turned my head away. He was like “What is it? Cant I give you a kiss?” I retorted “Must you give me a kiss every time we see?" Then he said “We need to have a serious talk, You know what i want(marriage) but I don’t understand your attitude to me at times. Can we see tomorrow?” I wasn’t sure what O’s plans were for the weekend and I didn’t want to couldn’t commit myself to seeing X the next day so I said, “Maybe, if am around, we will see” He didn’t like my answer and kept pressuring me to be more definite but I kept saying maybe, maybe as I headed back inside my compound. He drove off resignedly.

That weekend, O had to go to work but he came around in the evenings for an hour or so. I didn’t pick X’ calls all through that weekend. I knew he wanted an answer to his marriage proposal and I didn’t have an answer for him yet. I know it’s not fair to keep a man hanging like that and it was quite selfish of me but I avoided him all weekend.

I must say it here that since that weekend. X hasn’t called me or dropped by even though his office is just opposite mine and I know he’s been coming to work cos I see his car outside everyday. Once, I called him at night but he didn’t answer his call. He may have been asleep but then he must have seen my missed call when he woke up but he never called back so I have decided to let him be. Maybe that is the way God wants to resolve the matter.

Now to O and his own suspension…

After reading some of your comments on my last post especially doll who said, it was obvious that I am into O more than he is into me. I had to ask myself certain pertinent questions and then decided to lay low for a while and not call him or contact him and see how it all plays out.
I did that post last Tuesday right?

So Tuesday, I didn’t call. He didn’t call.
Wednesday, I didn’t call, he didn’t call as well.
By this time, I was like so I have been the one keeping this relationship alive all this while? So if I don’t call, he won’t call enh? Okay oo…

Thursday morning, he called.
“Baby I havn't heard from you for a while. What’s happening now? Anyway I got you ur gizzard”(There is this woman that brings smoked gizzard to their office and he had bought some for me once which I liked)
I said “Oh how sweet of you dear. Will pass by your office and pick it on my way home” His office is on my way home.

As promised, on my way home, I stopped by his office. I deliberately put up a cold attitude when he came out and didn't give him a hug or kiss like I used to. I was all formalish, asked him about work and other stuff. He noticed and was like he didn’t like my attitude after all he left his work and came down to see me and all am giving him is this cold attitude. In my head, I was like see this guy o, Me that came all the way to see you nko? Is that not a bigger deal than you that just came out of ur office? Anyway I didn’t say anything. I just said I was not feeling too well. We didn’t spend much time together cos he had to go back to his work and I had to go home.

Friday, I didn’t call. He didn’t call too. Friday night, I called him cos I needed to know if we would be hooking up during the weekend as planned. He had promised me when I complained about his having to work every weekend that we would hang out together this weekend.
So I called, but he didn’t answer. He was probably sleeping cos it was quite late at night then.

Saturday morning he called me. He explained that he was fast asleep and didn’t hear his phone ring. Then he asked me what the plan was? I was like how do you mean? He said “Do you want to see me today”. I don’t know why I felt pissed at that moment. Maybe it was all the long days of silence or maybe I felt like he took it for granted that I didn’t have any other thing to do except wait for him to decide to see me.
So I told him , I had other plans and it wouldn’t be possible to see him. It felt good to burst his bubble. He was like okay, I guess I have to find something else to do. That was not quite the reaction I wanted. I wanted him to feel sad and even try to talk me out of my supposed plans but no, the bobo didn’t even raise issues. So I said “Why are you calling me on Saturday morning to ask what the plans are? I could have other plans too…” He cut in “But I told you last week that we would spend this weekend together, anyway it’s okay, go ahead with ur plans”

I was at the market later that evening when he called and he was like he had been expecting my call. I said I had been busy and planned to call him later. I asked what he was up to and he said he was at his brother’s place cos he couldn’t go have fun by himself without me. I was touched small sha,lol…

I didn’t call him later that night. He didn’t call either.

Sunday was pretty boring but I resisted the urge to call him. I thought he would call but he didn’t. At the last minute, I packed my stuff and headed over to the salon to do my nails. At least the day wouldn't be wasted.

At night, when I hadn’t still heard from him, I sent a text:
“Hey, how are you babes, How did your day go?”
He didnt reply immediately and i fell asleep.
This morning i saw his reply “My day was okay. How was urs?”

So I have deleted his number from my phone(Okay I admit I left it on my second phone,lol…). It has become very obvious that we are not operating on the same frequency so until he gives me reason to believe otherwise. He is on suspension starting today.

Catch you all larer…

PS: Am still doing the thinking and praying o...

UPDATE
O just sent me a text now.
"How are you pooky?(whatever does pooky mean?) I asked how your day was yesterday but you didn't reply. Been a busy bee lately, havn't you? It's okay, I understand. I'm often guilty of that . Miss you lots. O"

He has obviously noticed there is some changes but wants to put it down to me being busy. Okay ooo, he is still on suspension so i won't reply or do I?

Settling...

Mummy said to me recently…
“Aphrodite, my dear, I would love for you to get married soon and to someone from our place. It is a thing of pride for a mother who’s daughter marries from home and not from faraway. However, I don’t mind if the man is not from our town but he has to be of the same tribe as us. A first daughter doesn’t go too far from home, you hear?”

I heard her loud and clear.

These past few days, its becoming more and more imminent that I may have to say ‘yes’ to X. O hasn’t asked anything yet so there is no question to say yes to. I know where my heart lies but it is unfortunate that I have to make a decision that may not be in line with my heart’s desire.

X is not a bad guy. He is actually good to me and I think he will make me a good husband. I may never get to know what kind of husband O will make. I used to love X, am sure I can still rekindle that love and make the best of married life with him after all it is said that if life hands you lemons, you make lemonade out of them!
I might as well try to make lemonade out of my lemons.

Love, everyone says is a decision.
I did not choose to fall in love with O. It just happened!
But I chose to fall out of love with X then. Maybe I can try to fall back into love with him again.

I know some of you my friends may feel that am ‘settling’. Maybe I am. The truth is that I really want to settle down and have those beautiful babies and if X is the man, so be it! For many girls, X could be the man of their dreams. Is it becos there is O and I am opportuned to have choices that I do not know that I should appreciate what God has presented before me?

I don’t need a soothsayer to tell me that my parents will not accept O simply because he is not Ibo. X is not from my town but at least he is Ibo and my family already know him and do not have anything against him.

I must admit also that I am a bit scared of waddling into unknown rivers. Marrying a man from a different tribe scares me really. They may have some strange culture and traditions that doesn’t tally with my own beliefs and values as a person. What happens then? Call it cowardice but the truth is I am more comfortable amongst my own.

I haven’t said anything to O yet. I don’t even know how to bring the issue up. X has been waiting patiently for an answer to his proposal. I don’t know how long his patience will last.

I wanted so much to find the kind of mind-consuming, heart skipping love I desired which was why I named this blog-‘Girl in search of love’ . Just when it seems I had found what I wanted. I have to let it go.

It’s so sad…
:(

FUNNY PHONE CALL AND OTHER GISTS

Something funny happened Sunday night. I got a call from some strange lady. I’ll just take you through our phone exchange. Let’s call the strange lady S.L

Me: Hello…
S.L: Hello, am I speaking to Aphrodite?
Me: Yea…who is this?
S.L: My name is S.L. Bobo Nice’s friend.
You guys know Bobo Nice now. My friend I met during NYSC that has always wanted something more but who I don’t feel any attraction for. Remember now?
Me: Oh…okay…
S.L: Bobo Nice has been my friend since our uni days and I went to visit him today and saw your pictures in his album. I fell in love with you instantly and asked who the fine babe was and he told me all about you. How much he loved you and everything…
At this point am suspecting where the conversation is headed so I chuckle.
Me: Hmmm,hmmm...
S.L: Please I just want to ask you a favour…
Me: Okay…
S.L: Please marry Bobo Nice. He is a very good guy and he is madly in love with you. He doesn’t know how else to prove his feelings to you so he poured out his feelings to me today so am begging you, please marry him. I am married and six months pregnant, I beg you with the baby in my womb please accept him, you will never regret it.
At this point I burst into laughter. Begging me with the baby in her womb ke? This na serious matter sha.
Me: Ha ha ha…did Bobo Nice put you up to this?
S.L: Noooo! He didn’t but I had to call you because he told me how he felt about you and he really wants to marry you, moreover I told you I loved you the moment I saw your picture. Please my dear, pleaseeeeeeee you won't regret it…
Me: You know what, am actually somewhere now so can you call me back later when it will be conducive for us to talk.
I was actually outside my house gisting with my neighbour.
S.L: Okay I‘ll call you later then. Bye.
Me: Bye.

Thinking about that call later. I felt sorry for poor Bobo Nice. I didn’t need anyone to tell me he was a good guy and all afterall we’ve been friends like 4 years now. Unfortunately, he was in love with me but I wasn’t with him. Why is life so complicated, I mean why can’t a person love the person that loves him/her equally? Why would Mr.A be in love with Miss B who in turn will be in love with Mr. C. It’s not just fair! It is only very few lucky ones that find a partner who they love and who reciprocates equally. I guess one can only pray to get lucky in love.

See now, Bobo Nice, K, B.G, X are all in love with me and wish to marry me but stupid me, instead of reciprocating the love to one of them, am following one coconut head(O of course!) who sometimes I wonder If he really feels for me the same way I feel for him. Na wa for this life o!
Anyway am waiting for S.L to call again and I’ll politely tell her that I am in a relationship with a guy I really like(Please note I said like not love cos recently I have been trying to re-evaluate what it is I really feel for O. Not sure yet if it is love, I may just be infatuated,lol…) and that Bobo Nice is simply my friend and nothing more. Marrying him doesn’t come up at all!

Ehen! Something else happened last week that I wanted to blog about but didn’t have time to do so. I guess I can blog about it now abi?

I was in my office jejely facing my work when O came in unannounced (that reminds me, I need to have a word with the office receptionist about this. She doesn’t even inform me when he comes these days. She just lets him right in. Even if he was my husband sef, I still think it’s not right for her to usher him in without my notice). So he came with his elder sister and guess what! Concidentally, we’ve met before(I and his sister). My company did some business with her some time ago. You see, this world is a really small place. Thank God we had a cordial contact then. What if we had some issues then and now she turns out to be my boyfie’s sister? E for hard o,lol…

Anyway, it was a pleasant surprise. He had told her about me and she said she knew me, so he brought her to my office. His sister is married to an Ibo man. I remember the first time we met, I had thought she was Ibo cos she really looks like a typical Ibo woman and speaks the language. I was surprised when she told me she was from Edo. O speaks and understands Ibo too although that should be expected since their mum is Ibo.

They didn’t stay long cos O had to get back to his office. When they were about leaving, I got up to see them off to the car. As we strolled to the car, guess who I saw in the premises? X! Remember he works just opposite my office. I think he came to do some stuff in my office premises or maybe he was actually coming to see me. I stopped briefly to greet him with a formal handshake. I could see O was giving me an inquiring look. O knew about X and that he worked opposite my office but he hadn’t met him before. X also knew about O but he also hadn’t met him in person. They gave each other some funny look, me I quickly greeted X and walked on ahead with O and his sister.

As they made to enter the car, O pulled me aside and asked: “Who was that guy you greeted?” I turned to look in the direction of X and he was staring at us. I quickly turned back to O and told him “We’ll talk about that later, your sister is waiting”. So he got into the car and I walked back towards my office. I sensed that he was watching me to see if I’d go back to meet X so I didn’t even stop when I passed by X. I just moved straight ahead into my office.

A few minutes later, O’s call came in. I was expecting it so I smiled when he asked
“Aphrodite, who was that guy?”
I replied “You know him now…”
“Know him? How?”
“Okay he is my X, the one I told you about”
“Your X. When will they leave you for me enh baby?”
“You don’t have to worry about him, he is not a threat at all”
“Are you sure?”
“Yea I am”
Na so that one come take end sha.

Later X dropped in. I expected him to ask about O and his sister but surprisingly he didn’t even say a word about them or even mention how I treated him as in just walking into my office without looking at his side. I guess he wanted to be matured about things cos it was really obvious that there was some thing up between me and the guy I saw off.

I have to admit that is one good thing about X. he doesn’t pry too much especially if he feels that he may not like the answer he’ll get. If it was O enh…wahala for dey that day,lol…

I didn’t see O all through last weekend. It was end of the month and as usual he had to work weekends. Na wa for that their bank o. I have friends who are bankers and who do not have to go to work on weekends even at the end of the month but not O’s bank. They must all work weekends at the end of the month especially those in O’s department (Operations).
Its annoying me cos its only weekends that we get to see and one demanding job like that will now be coming between us. Hiss!

Anyway, I think I have overyarned as it is. I planned to make this post as short as possible so nikkisab wont have to go on break this time,lol…

Take care y’all and have a lovely week.

I’ll try to drop by your blogs.

xxx kisses xxx

Do I trust him or not...

I know I have been AWOL. I’m so sorry for that peeps. It was due to unavoidable circumstances,lol…
However, am back now so you can please stop missing me ,lol…(I wish...right?)

So what’s been happening? Any interesting drama lately? Did I miss any birthdays, weddings, naming ceremonies?

I hope not!

As far as I know Oluwadee and Florida’s D day never reach unless them don go behind my back reschedule the date so that I no go fit chop wedding cake,lol…

So to the main Koko for today.

Na wa o…gist scarce sha. I no even know wetin to yarn una my fine people and I no want start to formulate gist(I know some people dey do am for this obodo blogville,lol…)

Anyway make I just dey yarn dey go. Gist must flow abi….?

First of all, I have a crazy midnite stalker o!

I have complained on this blog sometime ago that someone was always flashing me in the wee hours of the morning. Then I suspected K but now am not sure anymore o…If it is really K, then the guy must be in dire need of a psychiatrist counseling abi how else will you explain someone who stays up at night when im mates dey sleep just to be flashing another person’s child with unknown number. Sometimes the idiot really calls and when he/she finally succeeds in ruining my beauty sleep, they refuse to speak, Sometimes I can actually hear the ewu mmee breathing sef….Shiou!!!
Last night the jobless mofo called again and when I answered the phone and he/she did the annoying silence thingy. I simply said “Who is this stupid freak that calls people at night without talking?” I knew the idiot could hear me so he/she probably got the message. Rubbish concobility!

Abeg make I give una better gist jare…

O and I almost broke up last weekend o…

Wetin happen?

Na me find trouble sha…as inyanga dey sleep jejely and i no let am rest,lol…

But somehow sha am kinda glad I did…

So O came around last Sunday to visit and we hung out at one isi-ewu joint like dat. After enjoying a hot plate of nkwobi(I don’t know what its called in English abeg). We sha left the joint and headed back home. Got home and me I felt like not leaving him so quickly so we chilled in the car listening to some cool jams on the stereo.

Okay so he just bought this cute blackberry phone and am like let me admire your phone jare, you know see the functions and all. You know as man pikin no get blackberry, I can still admire abi?lol…

So I was admiring phone o and pressing keys o when I now stumbled on Message Inbox. The temptation to click was just too much abeg. I resisted o, really I did but the flesh was weak,lol…

So I clicked and the first message I see just cause katakata for my brain

“Am sorry baby, please we are in the house of God, let’s not quarrel, I love you”

Jesus!

I glanced to look at O. His head was flung back against the chair head-rest and his eyes were closed. He was obviously into the music blaring from the speakers and was oblivious to what I was doing.

So I continued, albeit stylishly sha before them catch me now,lol…

I checked the date on the text.

It read 12-7-08.
That day was 13th so 12th was the previous day.

But I was with him the whole of yesterday I thought. Then I remembered he didn’t come to pick me up for our date till afternoon. He had told me he had some office duties to attend to that morning so he would be coming late to see me.

Hmmm…so na where this man come go? I wondered. And who be dis opeke wey dey send am text dey say I love you blab la bla…

I stylishly perused the next text messages while glancing at him occasionally to make sure he didn’t suspect what I was doing.

I saw another one o…

“I waited for you so we could get his present together but since you didn’t show up, I had to go on…”

And another one…

“I sent some money to mum and told her it was from you. She was very happy”

By this time, my eyes were seeing reeeeeeeeeeddddd!!!!
I couldn’t believe what I was seeing at all.
Who was this babe and what was between her and O?!!

I needed to find out.
I needed to read more but not illegitimately so I closed the messages and gave the phone back to O. He was singing the song playing on the stereo to me but no be dat one dey worry me by then. I was so disappointed!

Before I go on, I must admit that I am no saint myself. Afterall, you all know some of my kuru-kere moves with X abi? But even then, I have never hid the fact that I was having contact with X from O. O knew very well that X was making efforts to win me back. He also knew about K, B.G and others and knew very well that he was the only one I was dating and doing intimate stuff with. The others are just wannabe boyfriends!

So back to my gist.

I gave the phone back to X while thoughts on how he was going to give the phone back to me to read his text messages himself was going through my mind.

I can be a manipulator o…don’t try me,lol…

So I started talking about how open I have been with him in this relationship and how I wanted him to be open to me too. I asked him if there was any girl in his life who he has never told me about. He replied that except for his ex who was trying desperately to come back with him, there was no other girl and I was the only one. Then I asked if he was encouraging her in any way and he replied that he wasn’t. If anything, he was impressing it on her that he was in love with someone else now and they were over.

Then I went on to talk about how trust is very important for a relationship to work…about how I need to trust him and how he needs to trust me. He agreed with me. Then I said one way to establish the trust would be for us to exchange our handsets that very minute and go through each other’s message inbox. It would help us to know exactly what is going on in each other’s lives. I knew I had a lot of crazy text messages in my inbox. Messages professing love from X, K , B.G, Bobo nice and co…but I also knew they were just that-messages professing love, nothing more and I was ready for him to read them!

O was reluctant. He didn’t buy the idea at all but I was insistent. I told him that this was a test of our love and if he didn’t hand over his phone, I’ll know he has a lot of skeletons in his cupboard and I won’t be able to trust him again even if he gave me the phone at a later date. When he saw there was no getting out, he handed over his phone and collected mine but not before he said: “I don’t know why you insist on this but I have a feeling, this won’t end well” I smiled. I already knew it wouldn’t!

Meeen this post don over long o…but why do I know you guys will have my head if I stop here and post part two next week ,lol…

THIS IS JUST THE BEGINNING!!!

LOL…am not going to try it before una go swear for me…

So continuing my gist

But I don tire na…una no dey tire for gist sef?lol...

Okay, okay…

So we exchanged phones. Now I had every right under the sky to read and peruse the texts as I liked. He had given it to me himself!

I opened his inbox and he opened mine.

We were both reading at the same time and exclaiming at the same time too.

Me: (Reading out loud)I love you! Who is this telling you I love you?

Him: Hmmm…that’s my ex. I told you she was coming on strong, didn’t I?

Him: (Reading out loud) Baby make me the happiest man on earth and I will love you forever…Aphrodite, who is this person and what does he mean by this?

Me: It’s K and he means he wants me to agree for him now…

On and on. We kept reading, asking questions and answering questions.

He had more questions to answer than me though.

There were lots of explanations he needed to make. For instance, where did he go Saturday morning? God’s house? Church? With who? Who was the girl who was apologizing? Who wanted to pick a card with him?

Questions, Questions , Questions. I needed answers.

He started explaining.

He was on his way to the office when a pastor friend who was a mutual friend of his and his ex called to remind him that that day was his birthday and he was having a special service and he(O) had to be there unless he(pastor) would not be happy with him. He had promised him that he would make it so he had to head there from the office, spent some time briefly before he came to see me. He and his ex almost had issues in the church when she was trying to give the impression that they were still an item which was why she was apologizing at a point.

I was disappointed and I told him so. How come he conveniently left out the fact that he had gone for a pastor’s birthday service with his ex when he came late to see me?

There were some other notable text messages from the same girl.

“Thanks for giving me the time of my life. I love you so very much”

I read this one and screamed: "TIME OF HER LIFE??? So you’re still going out with her? Where did you take her to that she is thanking you for giving her the time of her life?"

He was like, she was thanking him for the time they were together while they were still dating.

I dint know what to make of his response but i read on...

“I am talking to some agents for the house as per the specifications. It just pains me that after all these wahala, it’s another woman that will be enjoying it not me”

Okay for this one. I know O has been house hunting for a while now. He still stays at his family house since his dad is late and he is the first son but he wants his own place now even though his mum doesn’t want this.

But how come this girl is house hunting for him too? Which kain ex-friendship be this one now?

He explained sha that before they broke up. They were house hunting and talking to house agents together and that some of the agents still contact her thinking they are still together and all which was why she sent that text.

Anyhooo, to cut the long matter short.

I was so so pissed that I told him it was over between us and that he should get back with his ex since they were still so chummy and all(I no mean am o,lol…)

But then he pleaded and pleaded. He said she just seemed so helpless and miserable which was why he was trying to be nice with her. I insisted that he had to cut all ties with the girl if he wanted us to continue the relationship and he promised to do so.

I almost requested that he gave me the girl’s number so I could call her and ask her to stay away from my man just incase he wasn’t telling her the truth about the whole situation but then again, I decided against that. It was his mess to clean up, not mine.

So as at now, we are still together but i don't know whether i believe all he told me and if I say I trust him one hundred percent now, I'd be lying.

Na wa for man wahala jare!

Am out.

The party and the pleasant surprise.

Happy new week everybody.
Hope ur weekend went down well and no wahala at all?
We thank God for life and I thank him for all of you my friends. Una too much jare.
May this week bring all the favours and blessings we hope for, Amen.


Okay so what gist do I have for you guys today.

Plenty!



I just pray I have enough time to spill it all out.

There is a challenge between O and I going on now.

We call it the Romance Challenge.

Its like this, we realised that we haven’t been particularly romantic towards each other as we should so everyday each person has to try and outdo the other with some romantic gesture. So far it’s been cool sha and guess who has been winning. Moi of cos! That guy has no romantic bone in his body at all. I have told him, he has a lot to learn in the romance department.

Last night I serenaded him with my favourite song of the moment-No Air(Jordin Sparks/Chris brown). He was so happy. Who no like beta thing? Anyway am waiting to see what he’ll do today. So far I haven’t been impressed at all.



Last Saturday was my mum’s birthday and she had a party. I planned to invite O to the party and use the opportunity to introduce him to my family as my friend o, nothing more! I never ready to answer question yet,lol…

Anyways, that plan was spoilt when I realized K and X would be coming. Mum is friendly with both guys and invited them both. Knowing them(K & X) very well, I knew they would try to cling to me all through the event so I decided not to put O through the embarrassment. He wasn’t too happy that I didn’t invite him cos somehow I let it slip that we were having a party that weekend, however he thought it was probably cos I wasn’t ready for him to meet the parents yet.



I also invited B.G. The guy I used to date before I met O(see earlier posts). True, he is also still nursing the hope that we can still end up together. Sincerely I know he truly cares for me sha. In fact if u ask me between O, X and B.G, who loves me more. I’d say B.G and am very sure about that. He proved it in more ways than one while we were dating even up till now despite the fact that I broke things off with him and told him I was in love with some other guy(O).

So that day, There were three guys jostling for my attention at the party. X, K and B.G.

K and X knew they were rivals but they still put up a show of greeting each other with smiles although I wonder if it reached their hearts. B.G didn’t know either of them and they didn’t know him too. I tried to busy myself with attending to the guests but every chance they got, one of them was sure to corner me at a spot acting all husbandy and all. Even B.G had to go introduce himself to Mum as ‘my friend’. Mum being the sharp woman she is later asked me what kind of friend i was with that guy that came to greet her. I replied that he was my friend too,lol…



X’s own was the one that pissed me off sef. Anytime he saw me talking to a male guest for more than 5 minutes, he would come around and introduce himself to the guy and before he left us, he was sure to tell me some thing using the prefix ‘Honey’. I just tire for the guy. Sometimes when he called that Honey, I go just do ear like say I no hear at all. Which kain marking territory be that one now?
One of my friends(a guy) who attended even commented-“Wetin dey do that guy sef? Even if u be im wife, make e take am easy now!”

K adopted a much more mature attitude. He just kept his distance. He obviously noticed I didn’t want any gumming body not to add that X was always hovering around like fly over shit so the poor guy no see chance to take corner me.



I just kept thanking God that I didn’t make the mistake of inviting O. The guy eye for just turn reeeeed!!!

The party went well sha.

Later that night. O called me and it was to give me a surprising news. It was a pleasnt surprise.

He had told me some time back that his aunty(mother’s younger sister) was married to a guy from my town. I just waved it aside as one of those gists so you can imagine my shock when he called me that Saturday night. Our conversation went thus:



O: Aphrodite, you can’t believe this…my uncle knows ur family very well.
Me: Your uncle?
O: Remember I told you my mum’s younger sister was married in your place. They both know ur family very well. Speak with him.
(At this point another voice comes on)
Uncle: Nne, kedu?(How are u?)
Me: O dim ma(am fine). Who is this?
Uncle: Your mother’s brother…
Me: My mother’s brother? Which one?
Uncle: Uncle E. 1004(He used to live with his family at 1004 in V/I. As kids we called him Uncle I004)
Me: Uncle!!! Good evening sir! Kee ka unu mere(How are you people doing?)
Uncle: We are doing fine. How is your mummy? Is she there, let me greet her.
Me: She is fine, hold on let me give her the phone



I ran to give mummy the phone only to find the line had cut off.
Later O called and gave me the gist. Uncle 1004 who is my younger brother’s god father(yea our families are that close!) is his auntie’s husband. They had given him a lot of gist about my family and all. In fact O was just giving me gist about my family. I didn’t worry sha cos there are no skeletons in our cupboard so nothing to fear. Later on when mumsy was asking me how come Uncle 1004 called me on my phone to greet her instead of calling her. I had to explain what happened. She asked me who the friend of mine was. I told her he was just a friend. She asked where he was from. I said Edo state, then she said okay she remembered Aunty T(uncle’s wife) had a sister who married an Edo man.



Anyway, that’s the gist o!

O and I have some sort of connection. I wonder if this is a sign from God that things will work out between us and the tribe thing wouldn’t be a barrier at the end of the day.

O however told me that uncle E had told him that it would be a difficult battle to get my folks to accept him as a son-in-law cos they are really staunch Catholics and also wont like me to marry a non-ibo even though his case was slightly better since he was half Ibo (his mum is Ibo).
Oh well, make we dey see sha…


What else?
Okay, I know y’all have been asking what happens to X?
Truth is I haven’t told him anything yet but it’s beginning to look like I will have to soon given the way he acted at the party last weekend-like he owned me and had paid my bride price or something.
I am just being relauctant to tell him off outrightly cos again am feeling I may be making a mistake. O hasn’t declared his stand as per marriage. X has and like a lot of people(my mum too) have pointed out, he has a lot of nice qualities to make a good husband. A friend of mine (a much older guy who should know) also told me that what makes a marriage successful happens within it and not before it and I shouldn’t be deceived by that rush of ‘hot love’ that most young ladies seek.

Me I no know again sha.

The long awaited gist and some more...

Ehen…am back to tell the gist everyone has been waiting to hear. I no say if I no do this post today, some peeps go swear for me,lol…
Una see how much I love una wey go make me leave my work come dey update blog. And it’s not like am getting paid for it o,lol…in fact we need to start collecting fees for reading blogs sef or wetin una feel,lol…

Okay so how did the deed happen? Florida I hope you'll stop feeling one kind after reading.

Make una coolu temper, i dey come now(no pun intended o), patience...patience,lol…

As usual, am going to start from the last time I posted before the last(am I making sense?) Okay from two posts back.

As at last Friday, I was so sure O was becoming past tense in my life. X had been really nice and great and I was beginning to feel the way to go was with him and not with O. Yea O had apologized a few days back and promised to put more effort into the relationship than he had been doing previously but still he spoilt it all when I asked what plans he had for our relationship and he replied that we should take things a day at a time unlike X who stated confidently that he wanted to spend the rest of his life loving me as in marriage and all the works.

Saturday, I had an event to attend. A friend’s baby’s naming ceremony. X asked to accompany me and I said fine why not. We went together and later on went to see a movie at the cinema. All the time we were together, my mind kept going back to O. O had told me earlier that he would be working that day but he would call to check up on me throughout the day. My phone was on silent cos I didn’t want an embarrassing situation with X. The plan was to avoid picking O’s calls except when it was okay and convenient to answer it. Unfortunately, it was never convenient. X superglued himself to me all day, the guy just didn’t want to let me out of his sight justifiably though cos I was looking so yummylicious,lol…

So there we were...X and I and O’s calls kept coming in. My phone was on silent so X wasn’t aware but I knew and next thingI started feeling bad for O. I suddenly wanted the date to end so I could be rid of X and be able to call O. Anyway, our date didn’t end till late that evening and I practically had to beg X to go home cos he still wanted to hang out at my place a while before leaving. Finally he left and I called O. There was relief in his voice when i called cos he had been worried that something was wrong cos he had been calling all day and I wasn’t picking. I assured him that all was well and I wasn’t able to pick his calls cos I was in a noisy place. He didn’t pry as to where I went and I didn’t volunteer any more info. However he insisted that we were spending the next day Sunday together and even though he still had some unfinished work at the office he would try to round up on time so that we could spend some time together. I was willing cos spending the Sunday with O looked more interesting than spending it with X.

So Sunday, after church, I sent O a text asking what time he would be coming. I wanted him to come early so we could spend enough time together. He called to say he would make it around 1pm. I decided to take a short nap before it was time to get ready. I overslept and woke up around 2.30pm. OMG! I thought. I had kept the poor guy waiting! I checked my phone expecting to see several missed calls but there was none so I called to find out what was up only for him to tell me that he was stuck in the office as his boss had just arrived but that he would try to make it down before 5 so we could catch the 6 o’ clock movie. I wasn’t happy but wetin I go do now? So I just chilled.
X called to ask if he could come over but I told him I was out of the house.
Na so I begin wait for O o! I waited and waited and waited until I fell asleep again out of boredom,lol… This time I woke up around 6pm. No O…No missed calls. By now I was so furious that if I called him, I would probably eat him raw so I decided not to call, I just stewed in my anger. Then his text came in:
“Baby am so so sorry. Finally left the office now and on my way to ur end. Will make it up to you, I promise”
Hiss. I was pissed.
Around few minutes to 8pm, he arrived and was all apologies. I was angry but my anger was more because the day had been wasted and we hadn't been able to spend the time together as I had planned.
I didn’t talk. I was just boning. Then he said he was going to try to get us to the cinema in 15mins so we could catch the 8pm movie. This was a trip that normally took like 35mins o! I got into the car and he started doing some Jackie chan stunts on the road. Na im me I remember say I be my parents first pikin and I never ready to die yet so I told him I wasn’t interested in the movie again and we should just hang out in the neighbourhood. We usually hang out at this dance bar close to my house so we decided to go there for some drinks but not before we stopped over at a suya spot to buy some suya.

At the dance bar we sat a corner hidden from the view of other customers. We talked and we smooched. Okay we smooched more than we talked,lol… there was just something about that evening. Maybe cos we hadn’t seen each other for a while. We were really absorbed in ourselves. We couldn’t get our hands off each other. The heat got really intense and he began to stroke me under my top,fondling my boobs and tweaking my nipples. Then he buried his head in my chest and sucked on my boobs like a new born baby. I cradled his head with my arms and if you were passing our seat, you probably wouldn’t guess what was going on. The excitement mounted , I could feel his erection and my juices had begun to flow. We had to stop before things got out of hand.

Later as he dropped me off, we kissed. It was meant to be a goodbye kiss o but the next thing I knew we were tearing away again at each other. This time we went farther than we did at the dance bar. His hands found their way into my pants and he started pleasuring me.

Abeg me I no sabi gist erotic stories like afrobabe o!

He wanted us to do right there and I was like the place is not right and all. Doing it in the car is not just my idea if how I want our first time to be. Then a wild thought came into my head. My folks were out of town and my younger ones would be probably asleep cos it was late. Why not we head to a nice cosy hotel and spend the night together. Immediately I suggested it, I wasn’t sure anymore but then I had already said it and O was all for it(before nko,lol…). I went into the house, picked up a few things and we drove straight to this hotel near my house.

I stayed in the car while he went to make the arrangements then he came to get me and we went in. The room wasn’t bad. It was small and cosy but it was okay. It felt like a honeymoon even though we knew in our hearts why we were there. It wasn’t just about sex for me although I must admit I wanted to satisfy my curiosity and all but I also wanted to spend the night in his arms and he also confessed that he had dreamt of the day we would spend the night together for so long. Remember we’ve been dating since February and this would be our first time together. I know 5months is not too long but we try na, some people dey do am for the first date sef,lol…

Okay so back to my gist.

We got in. I went to have my bath first and locked the door. O was laughing at my shyness. It was funny cos it was only a matter of minutes before he saw the whole thing so what was the point locking the door,lol…anyway I sha locked the door and wore my nightie before coming out of the bathroom. Then he went into have his bath. He didn’t lock the door. What’s up with men and their lack of shyness sef?!! They love to fluant their stuff especially when they know they are well endowed,lol...Well since he left the door open, I went to peep,lol... He knew I was peeping cos I was like “Am looking o!” That was when I saw the sneak preview of what was down there. It wasn’t exactly massive but you wouldn’t call it small. I started wondering what it was I felt the other day. Did my hands deceive me?

I was still wondering when he finished his bath and came out. One thing led to the other and we landed on the bed. Charizard you were right o! You can never tell how big a man is until he is fully aroused. When O’s kini was fully erect, I couldn’t believe the transformation…in short, the bobo try for that side and he get gather small skills join am.

Abeg wetin una want hear again? I don talk am say I no sabi give details o

Anyway he was very anxious that I had as much pleasure as he did. At this point I must confess something. This is the part Smaragd was anxious to know. I don’t even know how to say it sef peeps. Okay here it is…I have never come as in the mind blowing, body tingling orgasm. I haven’t experienced it like that. Maybe I have come but didn’t know I did but wait o, the way people describe it, I should know when I do abi?
In fact the thing tire me sha. Maybe I am the problem here. Maybe am not destined to ever know what it feels like to come. I think I was circumcised as a baby. Could that be the reason why?
Another confession, I even bought a vibrator recently and a CD titled-‘A female’s guide to multiple orgasms’ but for where, I tried all the techniques wey I see inside, no show.

Anyway to cut the long story short cos this post is getting wayyy too long and revealing. We did it. O and I. It was one of my best experiences so far but still I did not come. O wanted me to come before he did so he delayed his orgasm for long but when I couldn’t take it anylonger cos I was getting very sore and tired, I urged him to come. He wasn't too happy that he didn’t get me to come but I assured him it was okay but really it wasn't, I just wanted him to stop feeling bad.

Since that episode, things have been fine with us. We've been really chummy like stamp and letter. He hasn’t stopped showering me with attention and he assures me that things will only get better.

But will they? Will I ever come?

I bow o...